Life is good. I recently made up with one of my dearest friends, I live in a beautiful city, and my friend who has cancer is miraculously surviving. I do struggle with Greg's deployment, and the utter loneliness of being a military wife. I miss having my partner to wake up to and go to sleep with. I wish he was here, and I wish I could talk to him all of the time. There are so many things that I wish I could share with him. Still, he is not here, and I have used running to cope. Even in this though there is a blessing, because I am growing, and learning every day how to be an autonomous woman. I feel that our marriage can only be strengthened as I am strengthened.
Today at the gym I kept catching glances of myself in the mirror. Yeah this body is not perfect, but it is strong and capable. What an incredible gift. I don't know, I think that as women we have to honor our bodies and fortify ourselves in exercise. We are not designed to be sedentary,apathetic, creatures who do not engage with the outside world. We are made for hardship, and conflict, and transformation.
This may sound strange, but in the last couple of months I have realized my own limitations, my own mortality, and how fleeting the lives of my fellow travelers are around me. I just want to fight for what is worthwhile in this short time in which we have to live, be honest in my relationships, and be true to my loved ones.
See how running helps me cope...the natural endorphins must alter my perceptions so that I am more perceptive to emotional growth, and maturity. Cool huh!!! Maybe this is runners high.